My boyfriend has just had a letter from the CSA, saying he has a 5 year old daughter? Am I right to be upset?
I wanted us to have children and for our 1st baby to be the 1st for both of us!
Did he know he had a daughter? If not then it will be shock for him and of course you should be upset. The implications for you now will affect things. There will always be that financial and emotional attachment to your lives and that will affect you because you might not always have his full attention and you may lose income as a result.
Unfortunately there is nothing you can do about it and will have to make a very important decision. The problem now is what he is going to do about it. If he decides to try and have contact with the baby then you may feel a little left out and not like him having an attachment elsewhere. On the other hand if he wants nothing to do with the baby then how can you ever respect him and want him as a father for your own children.
It’s a catch 22 situation. Just think very hard about things. I am in your situation and it really is difficult, I often wonder how much easier life would be if I was with someone who did not have a child with someone else. It affects both our financial situation and I often have to come second.
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